Play with your food

Tomato Talk from oodie on Vimeo.

The aim of playing with your food is only the playing itself and nothing else. Try it before you grow up! You can always go back to "normal life" so take the risk of getting lost in your own imagination.

It's fun, trust me. Enjoy!

The war is over.

Last week I saw myself, not in the mirror but in theatre. I applied for an improvisation theatre training in Serbia and got accepted, not sure why they let a Dutch girl represent Romania, but I’m positive that they didn’t have the slightest idea what they were getting themselves into. It was a seven days training in the small village of Kovačica, about an hour away from Belgrade. Travelled by train from Bucharest to Belgrade, takes 12 hours, and got this travel goody bag; slippers, a little towel, soap and one of those horribly smelling dis invective tissues.
The theme of the training was about how to use improvisation theatre to prevent unemployment. Interesting…. that’s also what I thought....

As entering and leaving a place or group had became a well oiled routine in my life, I thought I knew what to expect. Always on the safety hook I entered the group. I was still busy with thinking about the projects I needed to finish back in Bucharest and taking care of my Pandas, the fuckers. I wasn’t really there till I was put in the spot of no return...

During one exercise we needed to play with changing of status, I wanted to play it save and got on stage with in my head the role of a neutral character... but the an other actors decided I was the bad boyfriend with a very high status. Ehhh.... But within a split second I completely went for it, opened my draw of memories of asshole boyfriends and copied their behaviour without a single thought. When we changed status my 'stage girlfriend' showed me that she could do without me and I had to except it. It was great improvisation, and even more important: I left all my bad experiences in it. I sort of said goodbye to my negative feelings I had with men. My trainer did wonder if I hate men, hahaha..NO!

From that moment on I discovered the power of improvisation, the things you can put on stage from your own experience without other people knowing it. The group was very safe and friendly and -quite important- they didn’t know me. Find it easier to be open and perform for and with strangers. One of the rules of impro is: Dare to take a risk…maybe it's my time to take a risks. You might think I already do, but sorry... you’re wrong! Yeah… I move around and change hairstyle, job and county before I can properly remember my address, but it’s time for me to take another kind of risk. The risk of choosing; my EVS time in Romania is almost finished, what will I do? What does my heart say…settle down? Which direction to go into? Country, project…life? I need and will choose. Soon.

Something else…but not really. This training also made realize and decided I have to take the risk of loving. We did an exercise in which we needed to send love to someone on the other side of the room without speaking…It surprised me how much love I could give, how much I trapped inside and how difficult I could unleash it. Finally I did it, and it was great! Obviously shits scared it’s unwanted and will end up hurting me I decided that I’m also going to give it a chance in real life, not the least the love for myself.

The group we worked in was a very multicultural group; Serbians, Bosnians, Macedonians, Polish, Swedish, Albanians, Italians, Portuguese. It was sort of magical because it felt like we lived in our own temporary county. The hotel we stayed was amazing: bungalows with pool, gym and a great restaurant. Life is hard!

I’d never been to any former Yugoslavian country and the image of war was still very present in my mind, had no idea what to expect. The media put this image in my head about what happened, but who decides what's true? It’s funny to realize that I’m still ignorant. Of course the war left its traces behind, but things changed. After the Yugoslavia tribunal the Balkans left a big question mark in my head….which countries are there now? How are they being ruled? Are the ‘bad guys’ gone? Is it safe? To be honest didn’t find the answers back then and just put my questions in the box of “Things I want to find out, but not right now”. This was a long time ago, but the horrible images of back then stayed in my head. I must be true, on my journey to Serbia the war crimes and ethnic conflicts of back then wondered around in my mind. Actually no better place to have an intercultural training. We exchanges a lot of stories and feelings over diners en drinks, so different but although so similar..

Also visited the museum of Naive art in Kovačica, besides our home for a week the birthplace of Zuzana Chalupová…. my new idol and inspiration. She shows that you don’t have to have to be trained in an academy or other traditional manner to create great work. Her devotion and childlike images made me smile and opened my eyes in accepting I don’t have to go the usual route to create wonderful things. I can do it too! I am doing it, but now dare to say it.

That brings me back to the aim of the training, confidence is the most important skill young people should develop. Theatre -and especially improvisation, that can be done by anyone- helps to develop this sense of belief in your own skills and therefore is an inspiration to be active in finding your path, your work and your way of living. It worked for me, and I can't wait to inspire others. Next chapter soon.

Don't forget to play with your food.

Love, Judith

Who's that girl...

And what is she actually doing... besides eating a tomato?

I realize that for the past few months I actually haven’t described what it is I’m actually doing here.

Yeah, you probably know I live in Bucharest and am part of this European Voluntary scheme....

but what does that tell you? Not much.

Because I haven’t updated my blog for quite some time, and not everybody has been following me like an Elvis hawk, some question marks will appear. Maybe I can clear things up. I will try at least.

So, at the moment I just found out my next meeting is going to be late and I made myself comfortable at Piatia Unirii on a bench next to the fountain. I was supposed to meet this lady at KFC, best meeting point after Pillars, but she was held up at the dentist. I bought myself a big bottle of ice tea and started to make a list of the things I have done last week.

This is not that simple task, trust me please. It's ended up being a quite a random list of things that have all in common being passionate and having loads of fun.... of course. It needs to fits into the way I want to live, but I wont try to explain which way that is. A few things that occurred; Lorena, a short term volunteer from Spain, and I locked ourselves in for most of the weekend making promo stop-motion animations for the next Art-Fusion festival. It was great. Not all are finished...yet.

check: vimeo.com/5453367

I also tried to finish off my Forum Theatre retrospective but got lost somewhere in the middle. Focus!

Valters -my great and at the moment only house mate/ fellow EVS- and I started our research about how people see Bucharest. It became clear, after a couple of months of living here, that the contrast between people that love and hate his city is very big. This intrigued us, as you probably noticed in some of my previous stories. Valters had the idea to incorporate creative writing into it and we got in contact with another small NGO, Art-Perspective, that represents Loesje Romania. Of course you know Loesje…www.loesje.org

On our request they ran a creative writing workshop last Sunday which we analysed and really want to discuss. That’s why I’m waiting; the KFC lady is from Art-perspective. Will meet Valters in front of the mutated chicken center.

Tonight we will hopefully manage to get some rough drafts for the posters that we want to use in our documentary. We basically want to use the posters as a starting point for a debate about the image of Bucharest with people on the streets. Wonder how it will go. We need to hurry a bit because I will be out of the country in a few days, this Sunday eve I will leave for a weeks training course about improvisation theatre in Serbia. Yay! Together with the Forum Theatre experience, Art-Fusion projects -and another training I’m attending in Latvia coming August- I want to write a project that I can implement after leaving Romania the end of September. It’s still in progress but will involve young creative people that have fewer opportunities. My EVS finishes at the end of September…not quite sure where to go, but know quite well what to do. Is that not the most important?

Only the funding I should figure out pretty soon, which county will give me some money??

Am confident it will work out, as long as I stay focused. It doesn’t just happen. Do worry sometimes -too much- about what to do, but then someone summarises my way of living and it all becomes clear again. I do exactly what I want to do.

I'll tell you about my Gypsy fascination another time. I have been wearing some traditional clothes and had some unexpected reactions and weird confrontations.

Stuffz and Love.

The perfect imperfect city

It’s been a very long time, some will say too long, but tonight I decided it was time to update my blog. I think I was suffering from the ‘I waited too long and now it becomes too hard to update my blog…. fuck what to do???’ syndrome. I decided to ignore my symptoms and opened a new file. Deep breath…there we go:

Thirty now… it happened in April. But luckily nothing changed. I'm still breathing, and feel more alive than ever. It's amazing how in the past couple of years I really learned to live. I'm not saying that I wasn’t living before, but it feels I’m more and more giving into more my own way of living. Bucharest is my perfect mentor.


I will never completely understand how this city works and why things the way they are, but it’s no longer an issue. I stopped asking questions and just adapt the way she wants me –Bucharest is a lady for the ones that didn’t know yet. A busy lady.

Don’t take the bus, just walk. Forget to try to understand rush hour because it basically lasts the whole day....and for your own sanity; take a book and buy a fan. Don’t get worked up about it, it will only make the heat even more unbearable. Traffic doesn’t magically disappear; the roads are simple not made for that many cars.

But Bucharest had also a very soft and chilled side to it. Life has an easy going speed and whilst walking around town you discover many secret little hideaways that make you forget that you are in a big city. The architecture has a lot to do with this. Long lines of apartment blocks, old demolished buildings, churches randomly put in between -the fact is that almost every building is in a permanent state of being under construction. Like it.
When look in between you'll discover her beauty, promise. But you can also experience quietness in places you wouldn't expect to find it; you literately can be alone on squares where in the past hundreds of people kick-started the revolution. There is space to feel.

A nice thing is that there are no tourists, maybe there are but I don't see them. Have no clue if there is actually a tourist information point and if there is such a ting as a souvenir shop so I hope they leave me alone.

I like that Romanians don’t cover up things that are generally seen as ugly: Ruined buildings and blocks that all look they same besides the advertisement they wear. Like I sad before, I learned to stop question things: They’re building a new apartment block next to a deserted one, a women is shouting on the street that she collects old iron but I never see her carry anything and the sweetshop gets guarded by this man in a bulletproof vest. The simple answer, yes.

Nothing is detached but, when you look at it the first time, you will say I’m crazy. Nothing has to be erased. My life doest have to make sense for others, as long as I can see the bigger picture and I know where I am going.

I grown to just to accept it; this way the city becomes more relaxed. It's actually these imperfection that makes me happy. Therefore growing to accept my own imperfections.

Bucharest is often seen as this very busy city, but not by me. The traffic is the only hectic situation I can think of because, next to the fact it’s not safe to cross the street when it’s green and the entire pavement is used as one big parking lot that quite often makes you have to zig-zag your way through, Bucharest moves in slow motion. It is until know the most relaxed city I have lived in.

Please don’t question why. Why you wake up one day and don’t have any hot water and why is this woman is shouting on the street that she collects old iron but I never see her carry anything? there are now set answers. It’s in my nature to ask these things, but not any more. The great thing is because of this the city and living here becomes relaxed.

Of course there is also injustice in this city, things that should change but will probably take a long time. I don’t like the way wages are unequally divided and beggars and cleaners earn more that the average graduate working for a small NGO. I hate the fact that renting a flat usually cost more than a monthly pay check and a lot of students struggle getting a job after University. But this also has another side to it, a side that makes families and friendships stronger because you really depend on each other. It makes live more difficult but always just having everything you need without having to fight and struggle for it is also not a ticket to happiness.

I rather queue and wait and enjoy what I have been waiting for than being served everything and not having the time to think if I actually really want it.

13 years and proud of it!

The weirdest thing happened to me a couple of weeks ago, I turned 30 and nothing happened… My face just looked like any other day and I still had the urge for bouncing on a trampoline and drinking too many milkshakes. Can I also be found somewhere in the tree of live? Is that my spot just on the right hand side of the apes? There he is: Mister Darwin representing our species completely in black with a big grey beard and a face like thunder…is that me? Do I want to look like Darwin? Please make me a new branch, somewhere between the happy clownfish and the quirky trout…liking the ocean vibe, and Nemo of course.

primăvară frumoasă

‘If I was a bird I would Fly..’


...was written in pencil with elegant Romanian letters on the backside of this photo. Bought loads of beautiful pictures during this antique fare last Saturday at Obor – 1913 up to 1940-
It was a great day that I wanted to write about, but forgot... not on purpose though.

Every time I want to write I get distracted. It’s nothing bad, but I would like to freeze time for day so I can focus on one thing that I want to tell. One thing stands out but then another overthrows it. It’s a bit like our building, besides getting stuck in our lill 1 by 1 lift we also have power and water cuts without any warning. Today was a one of those happy days.


Monday morning, a beautiful warm spring day with the sound of singing birds chasing each other. My Sunday -I work Saturdays- started perfect... if it was not for the builders working on the apartment downstairs that have been my unwanted wake up call for the past 7 days. Today it was drilling, over the weekend they stripped the bathroom and not sure what will be next. But, it was a beautiful day and nothing could ruin my mood, I wanted to go to the gym anyway so rolled out of bed into the kitchen. Had quick breakfast and finished my coffee whilst doing some Panfu translations. Must say that it’s quite exciting in Panfu these days, there is this machine in which you can shrink your panda into a baby....Anyway, I was off to Obor market, the place in which is -besides a gym- a massif food and ‘random things’ market. You can also find here lots of religious stands, and take away food. Jesus is everywhere.

Because the gym doesn’t have a shower –don’t ask- I walked over in my work-out-outfit. It was not too busy. After an hour getting angry at the bike I went to get some tomatoes and a Bretsel as a reward for my hard work, together costing 50 cents. Inside Obor market is this bakery that makes the best Bretsels ever, for 60 bani -12 cent- you have this lush warm piece of heaven. In a couple of greedy bites it was gone and I was on my way back home for a shower. In this short strawl that takes about 5 minutes I shook off a gypsy lady with a golden top that tried to sell me a leather jacket, spotted a new footless beggar, two midgets and could have had my zip repaired at about 5 different mobile stands. You might find the words ‘new beggar’ strange but its not that weird. The beggars of the hood have there regular times and there regular spots you see, some sit in smashed phone boots others next to the fancy pizza restaurant. My favourite beggar is the one with the weighing scales next to the metro station, he smiles –and this is rare. One day I caught him methodically cleaning the dust of his shoes, pulling his torn jacket straight and personaly inviting people to come and find out 'their score' by only saying the word "Un leu!" I saw a proud businessman.

Our flat is close to the metro station, at the flower shop right and then left past the offices and the homeless camp -that for some reason has a fence around it- and then your there.
I'm getting used to taking the stairs, had 3 power cuts the past 2 months and don’t want to risk getting stuck in the smelly lift. Home! First food and then the shower I really needed. When I opened the tap a little steam was pushed out... that was it. Water pressure down, yay. I just accepted it and like there was nothing wrong sat down with a book and a made myself a sandwich with tomato. It wouldn’t last longer than an hour, happened before. The first time we didn’t have gas I got so frustrated and didn’t understand why us and why then and why....I stopped doing this for my own sanity. And of course after less then half an hour everything was back to normal. The workman started their second shift and I was off to a nice café we discovered a couple of weeks ago to chill, write some reports and answer some Panda support emails.

The wind was blowing warm air down the street I was walking through. Although I was wearing my new summer dress -which I bought last week in this dead cheap second hand shop- it was almost too warm. Spring started, what will summer bring? Think I will hide in the hallway of our block or in the National History Museum, not sure which one I fit in best.

Gi Joe

I walked down the stairs of Piata Romana and suddenly it struck me. My body was moving, my legs were placing my feet in front of one another. Besides having emotions that control my everyday life I was still just a human, a physical being.

Sometimes I get overwhelmed with feelings and emotions and wonder where my core, my being went. Lost, and so hard to find again.

There are so many legs here, so many bodies standing and waiting. Waiting for what? Is it the metro? Is it something or someone? And when do we know when we got it? Do we still want it when it's finally there, or is it just the longing we like?


Are we supposed to have all these questions or is it just me? I think that most of the time I am confused about what I really want and should be focused on because I get absorbed and distracted by other plans. Plans that are not mine…. Or am I the only one that doesn’t get it, am I actually too scared to surrender to my true emotions, and am I trying to hide behind others? Wonder if I'll discover soon, this maze of concrete might help.

Push the bar and get out of the metro station, into whatever comes next.

Like it here.