It’s been a very long time, some will say too long, but tonight I decided it was time to update my blog. I think I was suffering from the ‘I waited too long and now it becomes too hard to update my blog…. fuck what to do???’ syndrome. I decided to ignore my symptoms and opened a new file. Deep breath…there we go:
Thirty now… it happened in April. But luckily nothing changed. I'm still breathing, and feel more alive than ever. It's amazing how in the past couple of years I really learned to live. I'm not saying that I wasn’t living before, but it feels I’m more and more giving into more my own way of living. Bucharest is my perfect mentor.
I will never completely understand how this city works and why things the way they are, but it’s no longer an issue. I stopped asking questions and just adapt the way she wants me –Bucharest is a lady for the ones that didn’t know yet. A busy lady.
Don’t take the bus, just walk. Forget to try to understand rush hour because it basically lasts the whole day....and for your own sanity; take a book and buy a fan. Don’t get worked up about it, it will only make the heat even more unbearable. Traffic doesn’t magically disappear; the roads are simple not made for that many cars.
But Bucharest had also a very soft and chilled side to it. Life has an easy going speed and whilst walking around town you discover many secret little hideaways that make you forget that you are in a big city. The architecture has a lot to do with this. Long lines of apartment blocks, old demolished buildings, churches randomly put in between -the fact is that almost every building is in a permanent state of being under construction. Like it.
When look in between you'll discover her beauty, promise. But you can also experience quietness in places you wouldn't expect to find it; you literately can be alone on squares where in the past hundreds of people kick-started the revolution. There is space to feel.
A nice thing is that there are no tourists, maybe there are but I don't see them. Have no clue if there is actually a tourist information point and if there is such a ting as a souvenir shop so I hope they leave me alone.
I like that Romanians don’t cover up things that are generally seen as ugly: Ruined buildings and blocks that all look they same besides the advertisement they wear. Like I sad before, I learned to stop question things: They’re building a new apartment block next to a deserted one, a women is shouting on the street that she collects old iron but I never see her carry anything and the sweetshop gets guarded by this man in a bulletproof vest. The simple answer, yes.
Nothing is detached but, when you look at it the first time, you will say I’m crazy. Nothing has to be erased. My life doest have to make sense for others, as long as I can see the bigger picture and I know where I am going.
I grown to just to accept it; this way the city becomes more relaxed. It's actually these imperfection that makes me happy. Therefore growing to accept my own imperfections.
Bucharest is often seen as this very busy city, but not by me. The traffic is the only hectic situation I can think of because, next to the fact it’s not safe to cross the street when it’s green and the entire pavement is used as one big parking lot that quite often makes you have to zig-zag your way through, Bucharest moves in slow motion. It is until know the most relaxed city I have lived in.
Please don’t question why. Why you wake up one day and don’t have any hot water and why is this woman is shouting on the street that she collects old iron but I never see her carry anything? there are now set answers. It’s in my nature to ask these things, but not any more. The great thing is because of this the city and living here becomes relaxed.
Of course there is also injustice in this city, things that should change but will probably take a long time. I don’t like the way wages are unequally divided and beggars and cleaners earn more that the average graduate working for a small NGO. I hate the fact that renting a flat usually cost more than a monthly pay check and a lot of students struggle getting a job after University. But this also has another side to it, a side that makes families and friendships stronger because you really depend on each other. It makes live more difficult but always just having everything you need without having to fight and struggle for it is also not a ticket to happiness.
I rather queue and wait and enjoy what I have been waiting for than being served everything and not having the time to think if I actually really want it.
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